When Doubt Creeps In

Doubt of God’s love creeps into my mind
It causes havoc in my heart
It divides me from my trust in God

Doubt rages a war in my soul
A war that wants to triumph
Expecting the enemy to laugh with scorn at me again
Yet, the laughter does not come, the ridicule is not here

Comfort and peace prevail
Even in the midst of angry outbursts
The enemy has not penetrated my fortress
Protected by Him who loves me abundantly

The Holy Spirit is helping me by visions and soft whispers
He is guiding my feet and my path
He is teaching me through scripture
He is guiding me through His people

Many times I wanted to throw in the towel
Asking myself why do I return
And then my heart is inflamed again with trust for God, miraculously
Longed for as a spousal kiss.

It is a miracle, every day that I am alive
God’s presence and love penetrates my outer shell
The fortress in place to protect me from harm

My heart still sore from the enemy’s attacks
Still vulnerable, still healing, still trusting God
God’s love is beyond my understanding
So beautiful and tender

As a spouse comforts each other, tenderly, lovingly
with a gentle touch, a tender kiss and words of solace
So the Lord comforts me

Wrapped in the shelter of His arms
Protected like a swaddled baby close to the bosom of their mother
Safe from the enemy that lurks outside

And Mary, how is it that you should come to me
The Mother of Our Lord
Your very presence fills me with hope

For you are the Mother of Our Lord
The intercessor who I run to when all else fails
A true Mother that comforts her children

Mary, whose womb carried the Savior of the world
Whose trust was so pure, so sure
That doubt never entered your heart

Teach me to be more like you
In virtue and purity
In obedience and gentleness
In meekness and fortitude

I want to walk in God’s way
Without sin and regret
To be an instrument in His hand

June 5, 2011